World’s worst pun

Posted on December 24, 2015 by

What's this in the Dec. issue of Dermatological Review? A bound-in sheet of 180GSM stock with photos of various red skin complaints. Why? It's an eczemas card!

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Frequency asked questions

Posted on October 22, 2015 by

'Quarterly Transactions in Periotology' seems to be doing well. Everybody calls it Q-TIP. In fact it's getting so many accepted submissions that we're increasing its frequency to five issues a year. Doesn't that mean we'll have to rename it? Er... Oh, balls.

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Be sure always to call it please, ‘research’

Posted on October 6, 2015 by

Seb, here's the new company ethics policy. Can you put it up on the website? Let's see. Coo, this is pretty good. Who wrote it? I don't know, I just copied it off the Batley University Press site and changed the names.

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Bee serious

Posted on June 20, 2015 by

This afternoon I'll be meeting with B.D. Klein, the editor of Apiarist Review, to discuss possible strategies for reversing the fall in subscribers. New features to make it more exciting and engaging. Anyone have any ideas? "Readers' Hives"? You do know you said that out loud?

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Air a grievance

Posted on May 28, 2015 by

Where did the wormhole take you when you were accidentally sucked through the I.T. Portal? To the new offices on Titan. What are they like? They look cool, but the atmosphere stinks. You mean there's no banter or camaraderie? No, I mean the air smells of hydrogen sulphide.

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Silent as the reviewers board

Posted on April 9, 2015 by

Message from the editorial office at 'Tumour Research': we're to take Professor Hu off the ed board page. Why so? Apparently he's been dead for two years. I've still got two other reviewers with a worse response rate. I'm getting a message through from the spirit world ... it says ... revise and resubmit.

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At the printers

Posted on January 11, 2015 by

Where are you lot off to? The printers. Wanna come? Nah. I've got three-year forecasting figures to calculate. Okay. Twenty minutes later– Do you think we should've elaborated? Er... Naaah! THE PRINTERS ARMS PUBLIC HOUSE

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